Doctrine and Covenants 81-83

<p>Most of what men and women must do to qualify for an exalted family life together is based on shared responsibilities and objectives. Many of the requirements are exactly the same for men and women. For example, obedience to the laws of God should be the same for men and women. Men and women should pray in the same way. They both have the same privilege of receiving answers to their prayers and thereby obtaining personal revelation for their own spiritual development.</p> <p>Both men and women are to serve their families and others, but the specific ways in which they do so are sometimes different. For example, God has revealed through his prophets that men are to receive the priesthood, become fathers, and with gentleness and pure, unfeigned love they are to lead and nurture their families in righteousness as the Savior leads the Church (see Ephesians 5:23). They have been given the primary responsibility for the temporal and physical needs of the family (see D&amp;C 83:2). Women have the power to bring children into the world and have been given the primary duty and opportunity as mothers to lead, nurture, and teach them in a loving, spiritual environment. In this divine partnership, husbands and wives support one another in their God-given capacities. By appointing different accountabilities to men and women, Heavenly Father provides the greatest opportunity for growth, service, and progress. He did not give different tasks to men and women simply to perpetuate the idea of a family; rather, He did so to ensure that the family can continue forever, the ultimate goal of our Heavenly Father&rsquo;s eternal plan.</p> <p>We need to recognize the hard mortal realities in all of this and must use common sense and guidance by personal revelation. Some will not marry in this life. Some marriages will fail. Some will not have children. Some children will choose not to respond to even the most devoted and careful nurturing by loving parents. In some cases, health and faith may falter. Some who would rather remain at home may have to work. Let us not judge others, because we do not know their situation nor do we know what common sense and personal revelation have led them to do. We do know that throughout mortality, women and men will face challenges and tests of their commitment to God&rsquo;s plan for them. We need to remember that trials and temptations are an important part of our lives. We should not criticize others for the way they choose to exercise their moral agency when faced with adversity or affliction.</p>

<p>When an individual cannot care for himself, his family should provide every assistance possible; and when the family of the needy person has done all it can do to provide money or commodities, the bishop is empowered to assist. According to the Welfare Services Handbook, the bishop of each ward has &ldquo;the sole mandate to care for, and the sole discretion in caring for the poor [and needy] of the Church. &hellip; It is his duty and his only to determine to whom, when, how and how much shall be given to any member of his ward from Church funds [or commodities] &hellip; . This is his high and solemn obligation imposed by the Lord Himself. Whoever and whatever the help he calls in to assist him to perform this service, he is still responsible.&rdquo; Bishops must remember that they are under sacred obligation to follow the whole welfare services program of the Church as it relates to serving the poor and the needy. One of the key elements that is too often overlooked is the vital need for everyone in the program to work to the extent of his ability. Priesthood leaders who understand will not forget this basic principle. Souls can be destroyed when getting is not a partner with giving.</p>

<p>On April 28 and 29, 1832, Joseph Smith visited the Saints residing near the Big Blue River, a few miles west of Independence, Missouri. Of his visit Joseph wrote, &ldquo;[I] received a welcome only known by brethren and sisters united as one in the same faith, and by the same baptism, and supported by the same Lord. It is good to rejoice with the people of God.&rdquo;<a id="_ftnref1" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn1">[1]</a></p> <p>One day later, on April 30, 1832, as Joseph sat in council with the Saints, he received a revelation advising them that women and children have claim upon their husbands and fathers for support, and widows and orphans have claim upon the Church. In other words, the revelation established an expectation and order for support. The responsibility of supporting a family rests with the husband and father. For widows and orphans, who are without a husband or father in the home, they may look to the Church.</p> <p>Since the foundational meeting of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on April 6, 1830, prophets and members alike have ministered in one way or another to those in need of support. Take, for instance, Bishop Newel K. Whitney, who hosted &ldquo;a sumptuous feast ... after the order of the Son of God, the lame, the halt, &amp; the blind were invited according to the instructions of the Saviour. ... We then received a bountiful refreshment.&rdquo;<a id="_ftnref2" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn2">[2]</a> Then there was the Prophet Joseph Smith. Andrew J. Workman wrote,</p> <blockquote> <p>I was at Joseph&rsquo;s house; he was there, and several men were sitting on the fence. Joseph came out and spoke to us all. Pretty soon a man came up and said that a poor brother who lived out some distance from town had had his house burned down the night before. Nearly all of the men said they felt sorry for the man. Joseph put his hand in his pocket, took out five dollars and said, &ldquo;I feel sorry for this brother to the amount of five dollars; how much do you all feel sorry?&rdquo;<a id="_ftnref3" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn3">[3]</a></p> </blockquote> <p>Such care and support was not an isolated incident on the part of the prophet but one of many incidents that tell a story of giving assistance, which is vital to the eternal plan of our Father in Heaven, for as the Savior Jesus Christ taught, &ldquo;Inasmuch as ye have done <em>it</em> unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done <em>it</em> unto me&rdquo; (Matthew 25:40). When a rich man asked the Savior, &ldquo;Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second <em>is</em> like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself&rdquo; (Matthew 22:36&ndash;39).</p> <p>Through the years, the Church has followed the expectation and order for support as established in D&amp;C 83. For example, in 1849 Brigham Young founded the Perpetual Emigrating Fund Company, commonly referred to as the Perpetual Emigration Fund, to provide economic assistance to more than thirty thousand Latter-day Saints who desired to emigrate to the Salt Lake Valley and surrounding regions. In 1851 President Young instituted a program of teaching Native Americans to farm by appointing three men as &ldquo;farmers to the Indians.&rdquo; By 1857 the three elders had helped the Native Americans cultivate more than seven hundred acres.<a id="_ftnref4" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn4">[4]</a> In 1896, forty years before the inauguration of a public employment service in the United States, Wilford Woodruff established an employment bureau for gathering and publishing information on employment opportunities as well as compiling data on those needing employment. In 1918 Joseph F. Smith invited the women of the Church to contribute 200,000 bushels of &ldquo;first class milling wheat&rdquo; to the United States government to distribute to starving women and children of the Allies following World War I. And so forth.</p> <p>Why such offerings? Everyone at one point or another has need of support. Bishop Charles W. Nibley wrote of Joseph F. Smith returning to Honolulu and seeing the woman who had cared for him in his extremities:</p> <blockquote> <p>As we landed at the wharf in Honolulu, the native Saints were out in great numbers with their wreaths of <em>leis</em>, beautiful flowers of every variety and hue. ... In the midst of it all I noticed a poor, old, blind woman, tottering under the weight of about ninety years, being led in. She had a few choice bananas in her hand. It was her all&mdash;her offering. She was calling, &ldquo;Iosepa, Iosepa.&rdquo; Instantly, when [Joseph F. Smith] saw her, he ran to her and clasped her in his arms, hugged her, and kissed her over and over again, patting her on the head saying, &ldquo;Mama, Mama, my dear old Mama.&rdquo;</p> <p>And with tears streaming down his cheeks he turned to me and said, &ldquo;Charlie, she nursed me when I was a boy, sick and without anyone to care for me. She took me in and was a mother to me.&rdquo;<a id="_ftnref5" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn5">[5]</a></p> </blockquote> <div class="footnotes"> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn1" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref1">[1]</a> History, 1838&ndash;1856, volume A-1 [23 December 1805&ndash;30 August 1834], 213. Joseph Smith Papers.</p> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn2" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref2">[2]</a> History, 1834&ndash;1836, 171. Joseph Smith Papers.</p> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn3" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref3">[3]</a> Andrew J. Workman, in &ldquo;Recollections of the Prophet Joseph Smith,&rdquo; <em>Juvenile Instructor</em>, October 1892, 641.</p> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn4" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref4">[4]</a> Leonard J. Arrington, <em>Brigham Young: American Moses </em>(NY: Alfred A. Knopf, Inc., 1985), 217&ndash;18.</p> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn5" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref5">[5]</a> Charles W. Nibley, &ldquo;Reminiscences,&rdquo; cited in Joseph F. Smith, <em>Gospel Doctrine: Selections from the Sermons and Writings of Joseph F. Smith, Sixth President of the Church of Jesu Christ of Latter-day Saints </em>(Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1963), 519&ndash;20.</p> </div>

<p>In the family proclamation, the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve counsel that &ldquo;by divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families.&rdquo; These three expectations for fathers&mdash;to preside, to provide, and to protect&mdash;remain in force today. At the same time, the proclamation explains that in fulfilling the responsibilities given to them, &ldquo;fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners.&rdquo;<a id="_ftnref1" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn1">[1]</a> Providing for families remains one of the Lord&rsquo;s important expectations for fathers. The Apostle Paul declares, &ldquo;But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel&rdquo; (1 Timothy 5:8).</p> <p>Commenting on Doctrine and Covenants 83:4, Elder D. Todd Christofferson teaches: &ldquo;Breadwinning is a consecrated activity. Providing for one&rsquo;s family, although it generally requires time away from the family, is not inconsistent with fatherhood&mdash;it is the essence of being a good father. &lsquo;Work and family are overlapping domains.&rsquo; This, of course, does not justify a man who neglects his family for his career or, at the other extreme, one who will not exert himself and is content to shift his responsibility to others.&rdquo;<a id="_ftnref2" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn2">[2]</a></p> <p>Even in situations in which divorce or other circumstances change typical family dynamics, fathers still have an obligation to do their best to see that their families are provided for. The <em>General Handbook</em> of the Church lists a person who &ldquo;deliberately abandons family responsibilities, including nonpayment of child support and alimony&rdquo; as one in danger of a membership council.<a id="_ftnref3" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn3">[3]</a></p> <p>In addition, providing for a family does not just mean providing financial support. Fathers have an obligation to provide love and emotional support. In an address to fathers, President Howard W. Hunter teaches: &ldquo;You should express regularly to your wife and children your reverence and respect for her. Indeed, one of the greatest things a father can do for his children is to love their mother.&rdquo;<a id="_ftnref4" class="see-footnote" title="" href="#_ftn4">[4]</a></p> <div class="footnotes"> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn1" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref1">[1]</a> &ldquo;The Family: A Proclamation to the World,&rdquo; ChurchofJesusChrist.org.</p> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn2" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref2">[2]</a> D. Todd Christofferson, &ldquo;Fathers,&rdquo; April 2016 General Conference.</p> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn3" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref3">[3]</a> <em>General Handbook</em>, 32.6.2.5</p> <p class="footnote"><a id="_ftn4" class="footnote-label" title="" href="#_ftnref4">[4]</a> <em>Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Howard W. Hunter, </em>2015, 224.</p> </div>